haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I just blew my weed a kiss
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
me + whiskey = a bad person
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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