ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
