Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
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