That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
