The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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