its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
