I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
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