ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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