from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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