It's Friday. Sex?
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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