the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
There are leaves in my underwear?
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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