it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
