Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
