also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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