Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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