Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize