Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
