i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
