I wish my penis had an off switch
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
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