I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Blood and glitter go together right?
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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