What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Last time i carry you out of a forest
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
