Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
