Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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