i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize