i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Randomize
