You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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