Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
it's not cheating when I paid for it
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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