In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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