I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
