your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize