fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
