Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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