no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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