Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
