she kept yelling 'call me bella'
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
