We're like a lot better than the average bears
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
