whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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