I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
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