The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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