after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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