I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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