Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize