that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
