I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
