I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
The beer is more important than you right now.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
