Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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