If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
