what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
