he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
