New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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