what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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